Recently I trained as a Family Constellations practitioner to add to my ‘toolbox’ of EFT, NLP and Matrix Re-imprinting and I believe that Family Constellations transformed my life

I am hosting my first event (under supervision from my trainer!). I am fascinated by the connection of where trauma meets addiction, but we will address any topics that come up on the day. We may end up looking at someone’s relationship with a sibling, a parent, or even looking at whether they should change career!

Sunday 28 Nov Kings Langley Hertfordshire – 25 mins by train from London Euston, Close to Junction 7 M1 or Junc 20 M25

Book your place via Eventbrite HERE

 

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Family constellations was devised by German Psychotherapist Bert Hellinger who realised that events that are traumatic such as abuse, abortion, early/violent death, and miscarriage, can ripple down through generations and manifest in a range of psychological and physical illness.

One of the best ways to ‘explain’ family constellations is from a personal experience. One of our Sober Club members shares her experiences…

Family Constellation (FC) is not a term many people are familiar with so I am posting an example of what it can do to help you decide if it might be useful to anybody on here.

I’ll try and keep it brief. At age 15 I learned I was the product of an unwanted pregnancy, between my mother’s two marriages. It took me a further 10 years to get my father’s identity from my mother and by then, he was dead – but he had been the neighbour next door. I was understandably furious with both parents for the subterfuge and lack of acknowledgement.

I took the matter to an FC group. Around 10 people were sitting in a circle in a very respectful and quiet space. The facilitator chose a few people to stand in the circle to represent my family and the members who were featuring in my ‘issue’. It was like setting a play on stage to play out my family dynamic. Representatives are told what to do by the facilitator, who has had chance to discuss your issue privately with you.

The person being my grandfather had the person playing me, sitting on his feet facing outwards and he placed his hands lovingly and protectively on ‘my’ shoulders. He was told by the facilitator to welcome me into his family, to acknowledge me and to express love and acceptance to me. He then was told to rebuke my father, scold him for being so unconnected and derelict in his duties of love, acknowledgement and nurturing to me.

Representatives move around the room as the energy prompts them (and sometimes they feel really moved – its part of the unfathomable magic that is FC), and my father figure was spiralling away from the family cast, turning his back. When he was rebuked by his father, he turned and faced ‘me’. At this point, the facilitator swapped me in place and took out my representative. I was now standing with my grandfather behind me. My father approached me and he was asked to apologise to me. Which he did. He was then asked what he was feeling, and he said he wished to hug me and tell me he loved me. I agreed to let him hug me and in that instant, the whole situation was healed. Incidentally, the emotion being generated in that moment had moved the whole room to tears.

But what was fixed for me in that moment, acceptance, acknowledgement, apology and love, stayed fixed. That happened in 2007 and the issue over my father was laid to rest and stayed there in my heart. The fact that everybody in my constellation was already dead and departed, made no difference. For me, the energy was real, the sentiments were real and the effect on my psyche, mental and emotional health was real and lasting.

I urge you to at least witness one of these constellations at least as a supporter and representative and consider if it could help you – it is massively helpful to anybody who doesn’t have a perfect family.

Still trying to keep it brief, in another FC, I was acting as a representative for another issue-holder and I was placed by the facilitator to stand between a man and his wife and children. As the constellation was allowed to flow, I believed myself to represent possibly a mistress or an ex-partner as I was coming between the man and his family. As the dynamic played out, it was revealed that I was actually – Alcohol. So it is not just people but things and situations which can drive the energy dynamic in a family and affect how each member is affected. It can move huge emotional roadblocks in your inner world and help you find a place of peace, where you thought it impossible.

There is another dimension to FC where subsequent generations are acting out energy influences from previous family members’ trauma – but that is a topic for another post. Suffice to say, if you are curious about FC, please come along to Janey’s constellation session on November 28th in Kings Langley. It is worth the journey, maybe even a possible hotel stay and a day (10 am to 5pm) to see just what this amazing phenomenon can do for people – anybody with a family.

E. Sober Club Member

Book your place via Eventbrite HERE

You will receive venue info once you book, Kings Langley is 25 mins by train from London Euston or close to M25 Junction 20 and M1 Junction 7, there is parking close by. We will provide teas, coffees, snacks and ‘light bites’. You are welcome to bring your own lunch or go to one of the coffee shops/deli in the village.

If you have questions please email janey@janeyleegrace.com